Friendship is one of the most important things as a teenager. Regardless of your age, I’m sure you can relate to that sentiment. Sometimes after a hard day, you just need a person to listen, really listen to you, and help you through that. Or sometimes, you need somebody to celebrate your wins with you. In the vaguest sense, you need your people, people who will support you through your ups and downs, highs and lows, heartbreaks or celebrations. Being a great friend isn’t just about having fun, but it’s also about expressing trust, support and understanding.

One of the most helpful things you can do as a friend is simply listening. Showing genuine interest and paying attention to your conversations is the one of easiest but most significant actions you can take to be a better friend. Give them 100% of your attention in the moment and make them feel seen. After a draining day or going through a rough patch, it makes the biggest difference to just lend your presence to them.

Another thing that is a key factor in all friendships is communication. Without communication, keeping a healthy relationship is impossible. Your friends aren’t mind readers. Put yourself in their shoes when you are feeling uneasy about something, and imagine how you would react in the same situation. Always talk it through, bottling up your emotions can lead to a buildup of resentment towards them or even yourself, and expressing your concerns to them directly can help you feel a lot better.

 Accept your friends for who they are, and welcome change. Sometimes change can be scary, trust me, I know. But change can also be beautiful. It is crucial to be present with your friend even if they or their lifestyle is evolving. Keep in mind that your friend is allowed to have other friends too, and it is honestly healthy that way. It’s okay to be attached to your friend, but occasionally you should take a step back and remind yourself that your life doesn’t revolve around them. It can be harsh, but it is true. Branch out and make new friends, and they should be advised to do the same, while keeping a healthy connection with you.

Be trustworthy, the last thing you want as a teenager is to see your secret that you told in all confidence plastered on every wall. Figuratively or literally. If your friend is being vulnerable enough to share a part of them with you that is personal, don’t abuse that trust. Being trustworthy also means following through on promises. Flakiness can ruin friendships, and letting them down repeatedly can lead to them stop coming to you at all.

Lastly, have self respect. If your said “friend” is making rumors about you, talking bad about you, or is just always dismissive or rude, they aren’t your friend. Your happiness is important too, and if you seem to realize that the effort in the friendship is purely one sided, then you may want to reconsider. Sometimes friendships can be toxic and mentally draining, and it’s important to have somebody who treats you just as well as you treat them. You matter too, and it is necessary to remember that.

At the end of the day, being a good friend in your teen years isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present, understanding, and supportive through whatever life throws at you. It is about being a pillar of love and support to lean on through hard times, and vice versa. Listen, communicate, respect boundaries, and most importantly, be the kind of friend that you’d want to have.